Practice for Getting Unstuck

People often come to me feeling stuck.  They say they live each day feeling unhappy like they are not moving forward and have no fire.  My empathetic heart wants every person to feel love and joy each day and, at the same time, I know that sadness is often a message that something needs to change. 

Rather than focus on the feeling which can often keep us trapped in the experience, I like to look at the message.  

In fact, often just allowing ourselves to feel it without pushing it away can at times diffuse the feelings nearly completely.  It's often the fear of feeling too much that causes us to feel too much.  Isn't that often the case?

So the next time you are feeling stuck, try this practice and see how it goes for you.

The Practice:  Getting a Dialogue Going

*IMPORTANT:  If you are deeply depressed, this practice may be too much for you to do alone, please seek a trained practitioner/ therapist to be your partner.  It does not make you stronger by attempting to try to do this alone.  Recognizing when you need help shows a strength that most of us could use some help developing, including myself.

Sit comfortably and have a pen and paper ready.

Take a few breaths with the eyes closed and release tension from the mind and body allowing yourself to come into the space and give yourself this time for you.

Allow yourself to feel the stuckness completely without running from it.  It may be scary at first and it may seem overwhelming. 

If it is too overwhelming, stop here and find someone to work with to assist you in feeling safe.  This is something I do with people and therapists and practitioners can often be valuable partners in this process.

If you feel ok with it, allow yourself to explore the experience of feeling stuck and write down how it feels to feel stuck and anything you experience. 

For example, ‘the stuck state feels heavy and like it’s in my stomach and goes into my back but like I can move it around with my hands’ or ‘the stuck state is black and grey and heavy like a bit steel ball’.  I think you get the picture. 

Once you have clearly represented the stuckness on paper, go back to experiencing it and see if anything has changed. 

Now I want you to take a moment to dialogue with it.  Really take the time to learn about this part of you and see how it feels to give the part of you that is feeling stuck the space to express itself.

Once you are connected, ask this part of you what it’s purpose is.  Why is it there?  Once you ask, wait and let the part come forth with the answer.  Give it time and space.  You may be surprised by the answers you get, write them down.  Often a part of you that is stuck is fin fact trying to keep you safe or protect you in some way.

When you have received this information, thank the part for being with you today.  Take some time to sit with it and honor yourself for taking the time and having the courage to be present for your own process.

Now sit with your experience of the stuckness and notice how it has changed for you.  It may feel now like rather than pushing away the old part, you have befriended it.

Good luck and let me know how it goes!

Much love and light,

Jenifer